"I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders." - J.Proverb
There are about two and a half months left until I get to finally meet my son, and I can honestly say that I get more and more excited with each passing day. The anticipation fills me with such joy and fear that sometimes it's overwhelming...but I know that my strength shines through and there is nothing that I should fear. We're going to learn from each other, be there for each other, and love each other unconditionally...so what do I have to fear?
I wonder what he looks like (even though I already know that he's going to look exactly like Ryan). I wonder if he'll be an angel baby or a grumpy baby. I wonder what things he'll be into when he grows up and I wonder if he'll avoid the same mistakes that I've made. I want to help him with everything, but I know that eventually I will need to step back and let him be his own person.
It's been a wild ride (and yes, I know I'm not done yet) but if I can get through this alone. If I can totally turn my life around and devote myself to my son and if I can overcome the obstacles that have been presented to me--then I know the best is yet to come.
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